Wednesday, April 20, 2011

My Little Prince

I'm so many things right now. I can't decide between angry, sad, upset, scared, confused... I'm so sad for the things he may never experience. I'm hesitantly hopeful that this is all some big misunderstanding. Mostly I'm numb.

Andrew saw his physical therapist today for the first time and she confirmed what his pediatrician already suspected: muscular dystrophy is a real possibility. So I of course go online (big mistake) and discover that his symptoms ares spot-on with Duschenne's Muscular Dystrophy. The most common, most children need assistance walking by age 10, are wheelchair-bound by 12 and are dead by late teens or early 20's. I want to scream. How can this be happenening? He is my perfect little angel. He is smiles and laughter and a total pain-in-the butt. He throws temper tantrums and licks yogurt off his highchair with no hands. He throws a ball better than most grown men and crawls around the house with his shoes on his hands. He's so perfectly perfect and I can't do anything to "fix" him. He's my BOY, my son.

How do I DO this?